i wonder...........what

you will think of what im doing....to set you straight.....on truth.... u have swindle and lie in your life with everyone that has been a part of your life....and u play this game...thinking you are the vitcim....u are what u are stupid little girl...that has been given love and understanding and caring for your ass your whole life....and i let you pull me into your web of life.....and destory me by the way you treated me...disrespect is the most of what you did to me...and i was stupid to keep taking it.....but no more....these last 6 months and the many months to come is slience....i will no longer be in your web of games...ever...your mother.........

HER GAME....

WELL...ITS BEEN A MINUTE...AND I HAVE THE BALL IN MY COURT...AND WHAT IM ABOUT TO SAY IS TRUTH AND SOME OF HERE FRINEDS... NAMING NAMES...SO HER DISRESPECT ME..CUSSING AT ME..THREATENING ME...SO AS I STARTED THIS NEXT CHAPTER..IM SPEAKING TRUTH...if she thinks that im to blame for all her crap.....wrong missy im setting you straight.....you a person who lies and has selective memory....your a real piece of work....and the one thing in my life i dont lie....am a grown ass woman...u anit there yet...you have to earn it little girl

cont..........

as jasmine was living with me..it was where she had to end up...cuz she had two kids....like i said she took care of passion a lyr old and  keke at 9 months...she did take care of them as infants really good...that i will give her credit for it...but as they got older...she would spank them...while living with me..some girl name tish lived with us...and let this happen...and then i kicked the bitch out....wasnt paying to stay there she had to go...i really didnt like the thing...jaz took over my house...she let the girls eat anywhere...when jaz cooked....she cooked on high heat..she apparently tryed to keep house clean..she would always rearranged the house..near passion first birthday....we had a party for laylay..and jaz doesnt know this but she hurt my friend pats feelings..about the gift she gave to laylay...laylay and pat have the same birthday...but pat knew jaz was slick...on and off jaz always had visitors at my house..including when she needed her pot....sometimes i guess she bought it or her friends would or who knows how she got it..when i knew she had no money..and i let her smoke pot..outside of my house...and jaz would drink here beers..or when karessa came over it was beer or harder liquer...outside of  my house....i let this happen...she use to yell at me or cuss at me...told her 1000 times to lower the music...i mean i was trying to be low key for my house ...but i let her do what the hell she wanted...why im i covering for her....when the kids got spanked...for the littleiest thing keke was the blunt of it..she was hit the most...keke reminded jasmine of fatboy...at this age...im talking 1,2,3, she calling the girls..my grandbabies ..bitches . hoes, niggers.....doing this to them as she scolded them or when they got into something....many times i was in my room...coming home from work and go straight to my room and shut the door..i mean had my pc and my tv didnt need anything else...gunny would be in the room with me...as willie was laying on the bed sleeping and waiting to go to work...i would hear when she hit the kids....with the  door shut and i could her it that loud....i didnt stop it....and i was working with kids at my church and i took a child abuse class and i let her hit the kids in my house and i didnt stop it......this breaks my heart as i write this...that i didnt save them....sometimes the girls would come into my room crying and needed that assurance of safety...and she would tell the girls to get out of my room......
yes there were happy times in the house when she was there...but there were more bad times then any...when  friends came over to my house and it was like i wanted to take back my house...and i tryed..she would litterally cuss at me and yell at me in front of her friends...one time i told her i would slap her ass and she told me out frankly i  will lay you on the ground bitch...fuck u up....cont..................

havent been bloggin on this child for a moment...

been taking a few wks to make sure....that i bring the fullest of this story about the next 6years(2010)...i was excitied to know that i got to see my granddaughter passion be born....i knew god was going to give me this child someday...jaz was a good mother to her ..dont get me wrong...she knew how to take care of an infant...and right away she got pregant again with another child...she was at nicki house...i couldnt ever understand...why jaz didnt have a roof over her head...it was always someone house...i mean how do u do that...was this the new way of  living with other people and go from house to house...so she went to mississippi with fatboy and lived there while she was prego with keke.....she didnt like it there..no food in the house, house very messy...the whole nine yards...of a dirty house...and jaz told me to come and pick her up cuz she wanted to have keke at home in lakeland...mississippi is so behind in things i guess they dont know what century there in....they back in the day...........anyways i go pick up jaz and passion....and jaz came to live with me...waiting to have keosha...again i was at that birth..keke slippin right out of her ass like it was nothing...a nurse caught keke monster....again....jaz was a good mother for a infant child...and she was living with me...a house of six..in a two bedroom apt....cont.............

more reflections...radomly.......

JUDGE ME AND I"LL PROVE YOU WRONG.  TELL ME WHAT TO DO, AND I WILL TELL YOU OFF. TELL ME I CANT...WATCH ME....MY reference to this...ADDRESS TO MANY PEOPLE THAT  HAVE  DONE THINGS TO ME. THIS IS  WHO I AM AND  NOBODY I MEAN NOBODY  TELLS ME WHAT TO DO...YOU DIGG....REALLY

any reflection on my daughter..............

do you know that this child was in girl scouts....the whole thing...cookie, camping and even me being a asst. leader for a minute....being a mom as i was and ernesto was a baby....how could i have been a mother to her as i beat the shit out of her....wherei lived and my friends around knew i didnt do that....i mean i was a single mom...i distilled the girls scouts on her...i went to her school functions gave her birthday cakes from publics every birthday...gave her roses once for her birthday....come on...what the helll did i ever do to disserve what she did to me....all this mental and emtional and pyshical abuse.....im settin you straight little girl..i dont care if some damn judge ..fostercare....dcf and or guradidan litem read this...free speech....im letting other moms who been thru hell with there kids....im not alone.....geeus....jas...you were a girl scout..............come on.................here is jaz me pinnin her pin...the other is a trip to orlando.....