Three Days Grace - I Hate Everything About You

dedicated to my daughter...jaz.........

PIC AND VIDEO OF EVIDENCE....OF A OUT OF CONTROL GROWN ASS WOMAN

THIS IS WHAT SHE DID......................ENJOY BITCHES.........................

OH BEWARE.....THIS MAMA IS REAL...........

TO HER FRIENDS....IF YOU ALL ANIT DRUNKS CUZ YOU HAVE TO BE FUCKED UP DRUNK...OR TAKE DRUGS.....CUZ YOU ARE IDIOTS....OR....MOST OF ALL POPPING OUR PUSSY FOR MONEY TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR HOUSE AND KIDS....U ARE ALL SICK FUCKS.....

ARE U FUCKING KIDDING ME....A THING CALLED INTERVENTION IS WHAT I DO TO THAT DUMB ASS GROWN ASS WOMAN.....OF A DAUGHTER OF MINE...JAZ...........I WILL NOT TOLERATE BULLSHIT....AND IF IT COSTS MY GRANDKIDS.....NEVER TO SEE THEM AGAIN...THATS ON HER...NOT ME.....SO YOU ARE AMONG HER JUST AS SHE IS AMONG YOU...U ALL FUCKED UP.....

REALLY.....THINGS COME IN PLACE...WHEN MY DUMB ASS DAUGHTERS HAS HAD A PIMP THREE TIMES IN LIFE...REALLY...POPPING PUSSY....WOW....WHAT KIND OF FRIENDS DO YOU REALLY HAVE JAZ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,REALLY

I WILL VOW....NEVER NEVER NEVER...........

HELP YOU FROM THIS DAY FORWARD.....A GROWN WOMAN WOULD HAVE A ROOF OVER HER CHILDREN'S HEAD...A GROWN WOMAN WOULD HAVE A JOB...A GROWN WOMAN WOULD DO ANYTHING...AND NOT BE IN THE STREETS....BUT U ANIT A GROWN WOMAN....NOR WILL U EVER BE.....U HAVENT CONVINCED ME YET....WHAT ARE U SHOWING YOUR DAUGHTERS....TO RUN....REALLY JAZ.....MY GRAND BABIES....MY GRANDDAUGHTERS ARE BEING TAUGHT WHAT THERE MAMMY DOES....RUN...FUCK....AND ALL KIND OF HAVIC....YOU ANIT SHOWING THEM ACCOUNTABILITY RESPECT FOR YOURSELF....AND AND PLACE TO LAY THERE HEAD....

AND U WANT ME TO DO THAT...THATS WHY I SAID NO THIS TIME....BECUZ IM INNAMBLE YOU TO KEEP THE CYCLE GOING...BREAK THE CYCLE IS YOUR MOTTO...BITCH YOU HAVENT EVEN TRYED YET............I BROKE YOU OFF.......TO DATE 12/19/11


NOW LETS SEE WHAT HAPPENS..................................

ARE U FUCKING KIDDING ME...............REALLY

I SAID I WOULD TELL GOOD THINGS ABOUT MY DAUGHTER.....WELL THAT ANIT GOING TO HAPPEN EVER AGAIN.....THE WEEK OF 11/21/11...BEGINS....I LEFT FL TO GO TO IL....ON 11/22/11 OFFICIALLY JASMINE HAS FULL CUSTODY OF HER CHILDREN... SIGN BY THE JUDGE....

BY WEDNESDAY AND BEFORE THANKSGIVING....SHE LEAVES LIGHTHOUSE MINISTRIES.....I WAS STILL IN CHICAGO... ACTUALLY DIDN'T LEAVE CHI TOWN TIL...11 AM...TO GET  BACK ON THE ROAD AND GET BACK TO FL....BY 6:30AM FRIDAY..I GET HOME....I HURRIED AND PUT THE TURKEY IN THE OVEN...AND WENT TO SLEEP...I WAS UP FOR 36 HOURS WITH NO SLEEP.....AROUND 2:30PM...MY ERNESTO CALLS ME FINALLY HAVEN'T TALKED TO HIM SINCE LATE AUG.........

AS I WAS ON THE PHONE....APPEARED OUT OF NO WHERE WAS MY GRAND BABIES....AND FINISHED MY CALL WITH NEST....AND JASMINE DID HER ACADEMY AWARD PERFORMANCE AGAIN TO ME....PHASE TWO MA....WHICH MEANT I WOULD TAKE THE GIRLS...AND HER AND MELLY WERE GOING TO SHACK UP WITH CHARLIE BROWN.......

THREE HOURS LATER....SHE CALLING ME....I DON'T HAVE NO WHERE TO GO............I TOLD HER TO CALL ME BACK IN 10 MINUTES.....I LLITERALLY WENT INTO MY BATHROOM WITH WILL WILL AND WAS CRYING.....NERVOUS AND SHIT....WHEN IS IT GOING TO BE MY TURN....WE AGREED FOR TWO MONTHS AND I MADE HER SIGN A CONTRACT....THAT 1/25/12 WAS HERE MOVED OUT DATE......

SO.............................

IT TOOK 24 DAYS TO KICK HER ASS OUT.....SHE STILL CLAIMS THAT SHE IS A GROWN ASS WOMAN....WELL LETS SEE...ABOUT THAT...........

OK...SHE LAID AROUND IN MY HOUSE ON THE LIVING ROOM FLOOR...IF NOT LAYING ON MY LIVING ROOM COUCH.....CONSTANTLY I HAD TO WAKE HER ASS UP....TO GET THE GIRLS READY FOR SCHOOL.....EVENTUALLY I MADE HER WALK THE GIRLS TO SCHOOL...AND PICK THEM UP......CUZ AS SOON AS SHE CAME BACK TAKING THE GIRLS TO SCHOOL...SHE LAID BACK ON THE FLOOR NOT WATCHING MELLY MAC....AND NOT EVEN FEED THE BOY.......IN THE CONTRACT SHE WAS TO LOOK FOR A JOB...SHE DID THAT MAYBE THREE TIMES.....REALLY JAZ......

SHE FOLDED SOME WASH....DID A LOAD HERE AND THERE...EVEN DID A LOAD OF DISHES IN THE DISHWASHER AND OR PUT THEM AWAY......MAYBE VACUUM ONCE........


OH AND SHE GOT HER FOOD STAMPS...AND WE PUT FOOD IN THE HOUSE....SO YES I CONNED THE BITCH TO PUT FOOD IN MY HOUSE.....SO YOU LOST LITTLE GIRL.......NOW....A GROWN WOMAN DOES NOT LAY AROUND....NOT TAKING CARE OF HERE KIDS...LET ALONE FEED THEM.....SO.....TO ALL HER FRIENDS....LET IT BE KNOWN THAT IM AWARE OF HOW YOU CANT UNDERSTAND HER AND MY RELATIONSHIP.......

BUT IM OLD SCHOOL BITCH....YOU MIGHT CLAIM U ARE OLD SCHOOL BITCHES...U ANIT EVEN CLOSE......ONE DISRESPECTING YOUR ELDERS.....LETTING YOUR KIDS DO AND SAY WHAT U WANT THEM TO SAY...(CUSSING,YELLING ETC...) AND U WALK ALL OVER OTHERS AROUND YOU.....AND GETS WHATS YOURS......NO BITCHES.....


IM A GROWN ASS WHITE WOMAN....WITH BEAUTIFUL KIDS AND GRANDCHILDREN....AND I WILL NOT TOLERATE ANY TYPE OF BULLSHIT...OR LETS CON MAMA.....I HAVE A GROWN ASS BLACK HUSBAND THAT IS A GENTLEMEN...YOU YOUR NIGGAS..HOOD RAT TYPES.......AND U ALL WANT TO BE IN THE HOOD............................DO IT AND GO FOR IT.....YOUR USELESS BITCHES WITH NO GAME...ON LOVE...HONOR...RESPECT CARING WOMAN...TAKING CARE OF A GROWN ASS MAN.....WHERE U ARE INTERESTED IN GANGSTA'S FUCK U....ALL OF U...FUCK U...JAZ...YOU ARE A LOST CAUSE TO SOCITEY YOU A WANNA BE BLACK BITCH.....FUCKIN RED NECK BITCH....FUCK OFF

today was a good day...........

spent four hours with jaz..she got on birth control and got a bank acct...that a good thing mommy girl...love u ..love mama.........

http://youtu.be/8CPlF-IEkXQ.............................

dedicated to my gansta girl..jaz

YES MOMMY WHAT

MY PERSONAL MOMMY GUIDE,,,,,,,,,,,,NO WIRE HANGERS................LOVE IT..............

looking up............

well i have to say good things are beginning to look up for jasmine....yes she is my oldest...and my first and only daughter...and i want to say good things about her too...i know i have gone off on her...but i wanted to write...blog out my frustrations and the bullshit that happen to us...i give her the credit that she is now realizing..a connection of what she was done..or has done or was done to her or what was done to me..or what i done..or who done what to me as i grew..........she has come to the conculsion to get her daughters help for anxiety...thats a good thing...and she is getting her counseling done for her..and thats a good thing...when i think back...i was 32 when i realize my bullshit that was done to me(and got help for me)...and realize some issues with my two oldest children...but my baby..is 30..good job jaz...thats a good thing too....

so i might of went beyond and then some on how my daughter ....but...i blogged it....to let others know your not alone...but this is my life experiences...i still and always will love my daughter....and thank god i have only one....for me to come from a family of 5 girls...no way in hell would i have that amount of kids in life and they were all girls...my baby is and was a handful...and im glad theres one...now my two boys...thats .....well...

love u jaz...keep going mama...u can do it.....love u...love mommy

PUMPKIN PATCH 2011

GRANNY TOOK THE GRANDS TO THE PATCH THIS YEAR....

UPDATES FOR THE MOMENT...

I DROPPED OFF THE BDAY CARD FOR KEKE MONSTERS...YESTERDAY...AND SO HAPPENS JAZ WAS AT THE FRONT DOOR OF LIGHTHOUSE...AND I GOT TO SEE THE KIDS FOR A MINUTE...AND I TOOK PICS OF THEM.....JAZ SAYS SHE WROTE ME A LETTER...SO I WENT TO THE MAILBOX...AND SHE IS FINALLY GOING TO THREAPY AND ON MEDS...SHE REALIZES THAT SHE IS ALONE..AND SHE KNOWS IT WILL BE HARD TO TAKE CARE OF THE KIDS..BY HERSELF...BUT I DID IT...SHE CAN DO IT....SHE WILL LET ME SEE THE KIDS...SO I WILL TRY TO SEE THEM FOR NEXT WKEND...I WILL DO THE ONCE A MONTH FOR NOW...SHE HAS ONE MORE COURT DATE...WITH DCF AND SHE WILL HAVE THE KIDS BACK OFFFICALLY...OK...SO THAT IS A GOOD THING FOR NOW....

last attempt to my daughter....

JAZ….

HERE ARE THE BIRTH CERTIFICATES FOR THE BABIES…AND THERE SOCIAL SECTURITYS CARDS…

NOW…A FEW THINGS I NEED TO SAY FOR THE LAST TIME…THOSE TWO WKS OF CHAOS WAS ENOUGH…I LISTEN… I WAS HAPPY TO HAVE MY GRANDGIRLS AND WAS SO IMPRESS WITH MACKERS… THIS LAST YEAR WHERE I JUST STOPPED COMMUNICATION AND CUT ALL TIES… WAS A GOOD THING…ONE..MS.BEVERELY SUGGESTED THAT…SO I DID…LITERALLY STEPPED DOWN…MY STRESS FACTOR IS GONE…I HAD RESPONSABILTYS TO GUNTHER AND WILLIE…I WASN’T TAKING CARE OF THEM LIKE IT WAS..BEFORE THE GRANDS..I HAVE FOUCS ON GUNNY AND HE HAS SHINED HIS FIRST YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL…NO ESE AT THE MOMENT AND THAT IS IMPORTANT RIGHT NOW..HE HAS A DREAM AND I WILL STAND BEHIND HIM TIL HE WALKS ACROSS THAT STAGE…AND I WANT TO SEE THAT…I FELT I DIDN’T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT MY SON AND WILL WILL BECAUSE I WAS TENDING TO YOU…MOST OF ALL I SHOULD OF STOPPED TENDING TO YOU WHEN U TURN 18..MAYBE THERE WOULD HAVE BEEN A BETTER OUTLOOK BETWEEN YOU AND ME..

I HAVE BENT OVER BACKWARDS FOR YOU…I WAS THERE FOR YOU..I WAS THERE FOR THE GRANDS FROM DAY ONE…I LET YOU DESTORY MY APARTMENTS I GAVE YOU A CUSHION.. I GAVE U A HOME.. FOR YOU AND THE BABIES…BUT…I LET YOU..YELL AND CUSS ME..I LET YOU DISRESPECT ME AND MY HOME…I MUST BE THE MOST GULLABLE MOTHER OF ALL TIMES…I DIDN’T LET YOU FALL FLAT ON YOUR ASS…I KEPT TAKING U IN…CUZ U KNOW HOW TO MANIULATE ME..I LOVE U MOMMY…AND I FELL FOR IT…SO IF I KICKED YOU OUT I WAS TRYING TO MAKE U FALL…NOT FAIL…BUT FALL…I DON’T OWE YOU ANYTHING..INCLUDING RESPECT…YOU TOOK YOUR LIFE AT 13 AND STARTED RUNNING AND U BEEN RUNNING SINCE…YOU ARE STUCK IN THIS ALL ABOUT ME GENERATION…AND IT ANIT ABOUT YOU…YOU HAVE THREE BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN(ITS ALL ABOUT THEM).. AND U HAVENT SHOWED THEM ANY STABLE ENIVORMENT YET…U NEVERED FINISHED SCHOOL…U DON’T HAVE A JOB…YOU DON’T HAVE A HOME FOR THEM..U DON’T HAVE MONEY..YOU DON’T HAVE A CAR…THESE ARE THINGS THAT U NEED TO HAVE…TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR FAMILY…U MADE THAT DESCION WHEN U STARTED RUNNING AT 13..YOU MAY BE BLAMING ME FOR THAT…BUT U CANT…U RAN…I LET GO…I LET YOU COME IN ANT OUT OF MY LIFE…GIVING ME HAVIC….BECUZ I WAS A MOM..I FOLLOW ALONG WITH YOUR BULLSHIT…AND NOW U CANT HANDLE IT..CUZ IVE WALKED AWAY…FOR A WHOLE YEAR(AND U THINK BECUZ THAT HURTS YOU…NO..U HAVE HURTED ME) AND THAT TO ME IS A GOOD THING…I WILL NOT BE SUBJECT TO YOUR BULL SHIT AND HOW U WANT TO RUNS THINGS…YOU ANIT IN CONTROL(YES IM IN CONTROL OF MY LIFE AND WHO IS AROUND ME BUT I THOUGHT I TAUGHT YOU THAT I GUESS U DIDN’T GET THE MEMO)…. YOU ARE FLYING BY THE SEAT OF YOU PANTS WITH LIFE…THAT EVERYONE OWES YOU….

YOU THINK THAT THIS IS THE GETTHO LIFE…KEEP ON..BUT YOUR CHILDREN ARE SUFFERING…THEY ARE NOT IN AN STABLE ENIRVOMENT…THEY BEEN IN FOSTERCARE…AND NOW A SHELTER…YOU BEEN THERE A WHOLE YEAR…AND WHAT I SEE…YOU THE SAME OLE JAZ…YOU HAVENT CHANGED…I WOULD OF DONE ANYTHING TO GET MY KIDS BACK..I WOULD OF TAKING ANYTHING  TO TAKE THE PARENTING CLASSES THE ANGER MANAGEMENT CLASSES…FROM DAY ONE WHEN THEY TOOK THE KIDS AND PUT THEM INTO FOSTERCARE…I WOULD OF BITCH SCREAM AND FOUGHT MY WAY TO GET MY KIDS OUT OF THE SYSTEM…THE MOMENT THEY WERE TAKEN…ITS 2011..I WOULD OF DONE ALL THINGS THAT THE COURT ASKED OF ME…AND WOULD OF DONE MORE OF WHAT THEY DIDN’T ASK OF YOU TO DO..TO GET THE KIDS BACK….THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN A STURCTURE PLAN FOR YOU TO DO…A MOM WOULD OF DONE ANYTHING…

I SPENT MONEY FOR A LAWYER THAT DID NOTHING…I WOULD OF FOUGHT SO HARD…AND (YOU) SHOULD OF DEMANDED TO THE COURT AND THE STATE..FOR THEM TO BE WITH ME….YOU WOULD OF DONE ANYTHING FOR YOUR KIDS…BUT YOU LET IT GO…AND U HAD TO FOLLOW THERE RULES…BUT..U LIVE AND LEARN…THAT’S ON U…NOW U ALMOST HAVE THE KIDS…SO THE STATE WILL CLOSE THE CASE EVENTUALLY SO…GET IT DONE…AND GET THEM OUT OF YOUR LIFE(DCF)…YOU OWE THAT TO YOUR CHILDREN…

I DIDN’T HAVE MY CHILDREN TAKEN AWAY…I TOOK AND TAKE CARED OF MY RESPONSABILITYS…AND I DID THAT FOR YOU TIL YOU WERE 29..NOW I WALKED AWAY AFTER TWO WKS…WHAT U CANT HANDLE IT…

NOW…I NEED TO SAY THIS ONE THING….I HAVE COME TO A CONSULION OF THIS…NOW IN MY LIFE…WHERE I CAN HANDLE THIS…WHAT IM ABOUT TO SAY…….

ONE…GET YOUR KIDS BACK…(I STAYED OUT OF THIS FOR A REASON,FOR YOU TO GET THEM BACK)…(PLUS I  THINK THAT U WOULD OF FIGURE THIS OUT WHY I STEPPED BACK FOR ALL THIS)...AT ANYTIME…AFTER THEY ARE OFFICALLY BACK WITH YOU 100%....

I CAN UNDERSTAND AND CAN ACCEPT THAT IF U CANT HANDLE BEING A MOM FOR ANY REASON…ITS OK…ITS OK FOR YOU TO DO WHAT U WANT TO DO..LIVE YOUR LIFE THE WAY YOU WANT TO…I WILL NOT JUDGE YOU.. I CAN LET IT GO….BUT IF YOU NEED ME TO TAKE CARE OF THE KIDS I WILL DO THAT…GIVE THEM A LIFE THAT IS STABLED…GIVE THEM A CHANCE TO ERASE WHAT AS BEEN DONE…AND GET THEM THRU THIS WITH CARING AND UNDERSTANDING SO THEY CAN BE SOMEBODY SOME DAY…ITS OK…FOR MY MOTHER TO LEAVE ME…OR A SISTER WHO LET ONE OF HERE KIDS GO..FOR ANOTHER SISTER TO WALK AWAY HER KIDS…ITS OK…I UNDERSTAND WHY MY SISTERS DID THAT.. BUT AS FOR MY  OWN.. I DON’T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT MY MOTHER WHY SHE WALKED AWAY FROM ME…I OVERCAME AND WENT BEYOND MY LIFE TO GET WHERE I AM TODAY…I HAVE FOUGHT FOR THIS LIFE…TO BE WHO I AM AND WHAT I AM…A STRONG OVER POWERING CONTROLLED MOTHER AND OR WOMAN…BE CUZ I DO AND GET WHAT I WANT…BY GOING AFTER IT…YOU ARE A STRONG WOMAN…MORE STRONGER THAN ME..WHEN IT COMES TO MAKING YOUR OWN RULES AND LIVING THEM..YOU DON’T GIVE A FUCK…I DON’T GIVE A FUCK..BUT I TEND TO HAVE THAT STUPID ASS RESOPNABILITY FACTOR IN MY ASS AT 200% MEANING I DO WHATS RIGHT I GUESS AS I LIVE LIFE…I MAY BITCH AND MOAN ..YOU KNOW I WILL TAKE CARE OF THE BABIES…YOU ARE THERE MOTHER…BUT U CAN LIVE YOUR LIFE ON YOUR TERMS…JUST LET ME TAKE CARE OF THEM..AND U DO YOUR THING…ITS OK JAZ…I UNDERSTAND…I GIVIN YOU AN OUTLET TO DO WHAT YOU WANT…BUT…I HOPE YOU CAN OVERCOME ALL THIS…AND PROVE ME WRONG…ANY THIS DOESN’T  WILL TAKE CARE OF THE BABIES…ITS FUNNY THERE ARE DIFFERENT RULES WHEN YOU BECOME A GRANDPARENT…I THINK YOU MATURE ENOUGH AND GET A SECOND CHANCE TO RAISE KIDS DIFFERENT..BUT WITH ALL THE THINGS I HAVE SEEN OR BEEN DONE TO…I HOPE I DID OVERCOME MY UPBRINGING BETTER THAN IT WAS DONE UPON ME.. I KNOW I DID A BETTER JOB…I ALSO DID THE BEST I DID WITH MY KIDS…THERE MIGHT HAVE BEEN SOME ISSUES…BUT YOU LIVE AND LEARN.. AND I KNOW I DID THAT…I HAVE CHANGE WITH THE TIMES…AND STILL LEARNING AS I GO…YOU CAN DO THAT TO…

RIGHT NOW  IM SETTING MY BOUNDRIES WITH YOU…I WILLING TO SIT BACK…I HOPE I CAN SEE THE GRANDS…BUT ON YOUR TERMS…BE ADULT ABOUT IT…I CAN SEE THEM ONCE A MONTH FOR A VISIT OR TALKING ON THE PHONE IS OK..BE WOMAN ABOUT IT AND TELL YOUR KIDS ITS OK…WHY U AND I DON’T SEE THE SAME PAGE…WE HAVE DIFFERENCES AND OUTLOOKS…AND ITS OK….

I LOVE U…AND IM HAPPY THAT THEY ARE BACK WITH YOU…DO WHATEVER IT TAKES…AND BE STRONG…I HOPE YOU DON’T THINK THAT I SAID WHAT I SAID IN THIS LETTER…BUT..I WANTED YOU TO KNOW ..WHAT IM FEELING…LOVE U JAZ..ALWALYS..MOMS….

SHE IS 30 YRS OLD TODAY......

SO WHAT...SHE HASNT ACCOMPLISHED ANYTHING...BUT HAVING THREE KIDS...SHE HAS NO JOB..NO APT..NO MONEY..NO CAR...NOTHING TO SHOW FOR IT...BUT THREE KIDS...HOW DO YOU DO THAT....I DID ALOT BY THE TIME I WAS 30.....WILL SHE EVER IMPRESS ME....DONT THINK SO....WILL SHE EVER CHANGE...DONT THINK SO...SHE FLYING BY THE SEAT OF HER PANTS...AND SHE HAS THREE RESPONSABILITYS....TO BAD SO SAD..IM OUT...........

stop running..

with skiddders.........really jasmine....playing to fast....u havent change a bit....so...i knew when i step back again....the old jasmine appearered....REALLY..............whateva................

U STILL THE SAME

AND YOU WILL NEVER CHANGE.............SAME OLE JASMINE...IN HER PRIME...CON/NING AND SCHEMING......AS SHE GOES THRU LIFE....REALLY GETTING OLD HERE....BUT...ITS ON HER...TO TAKE IT TO THE LEVEL...THAT SHE IS ON....U NEED TO PULL YOUR BIG PANITES ON GIRLY...AND GET OVER IT....U WILL NOT CONTROL ME ANYWAY SHAPE OR FOURM....AND LESS THEN A WK...U WILL BE 30....GEE US..........WHATEVA........THIS BITCH...IS A TRUE DALLNER BITCH(ME)...IM THE OLDEST HER IN THIS DAMN FAMILY..(ME) YOUR MAMMY...SO U WILL ADDRESS ME AS MS BITCH FROM NOW ON..IM THE TRUE DALLNER BITCH MADE BY THE FINEST...THEY MADE HAD FUCK MY LIFE UP....BUT IN MY LIFE...I OVERCAME...AND WENT BEYOND...AND MADE MY DREAMS COME TRUE...U LITTLE DALLNER GIRL...U JUST LOST..U WILL NEVER BE A TRUE DALLNER BITCH OR SURPASS WHAT A TRUE DALLNER BITCH REALLY IS...AND THATS ME...AND I RAISE YOU..TO CARRY ON THE TRUE BITCH OF A DALLNER....THINK NOT...U ........WELL..IM DONE.............

REALLY....................

WILL NOT FALL FOR YOUR BULLSHIT....WHEN IT COMES TO YOU.....THESE LAST 2 WKS OF UTTER BULLSHIT...IS DONE....YOU STILL CON NIG ME....AND THE SYSTEM...BUT ITS OK....YOU THE ONE...THAT WILL DO THIS ALL OVER AGAIN....AS I SIT BACK AND WATCH....FROM THE SIDELINES....IM DONE............BACK TO WHERE IT WAS...NOT DOING A DAMN THING....YOU A GONER...ALWAYS HAS BEEN AND ALWAYS WILL BE....U A FUCKIN LOSER...............WHATEVA...........BITCH....................YOUR GROWN ASS MAMA....BE GONE..................

things are changing...

took my grandbabies to daytona...saw my grandson two days later...thanks jaz....taking this slow..........

now

what........

IDGAF............

DEDICATED TO YOU JASMINE LOUISE DALLNER.....BE GONE...SO GLAD YOU ARE WASTING TIME....WITH YOUR LIFE....

ALMOST ONE YEAR.......

I STOPPED COMMUNICATING WITH MY DAUGHTER....THIS NEW CHAPTER IN LIFE...WILL BE AN ONGOING PROCESS....I VOW TO MYSELF(WRITER OF THIS BLOG)..I WILL KEEP MY PROMISE TO MYSELF...THAT IM DONE.........IT WAS SUGGESTED BY DCF THAT I STOP COMMUNICATING WITH HER...AND I DID...ITS THE BEST THING IVE EVER DONE IN LIFE...ITS ALMOST FULL CIRCLE....

I HAVE LIVED LIFE AS A SINGLE PARENT...TOOK CARE OF MY CHILDREN..WENT TO COLLEGE...GOT MARRIED HAD ONE MORE CHILD..TOOK CARE OF MY CHILDREN AND DID NOT TOLERATE THEM WHEN THEY BROKE THE LAW...I RECIEVED THREE GRANDCHILDREN IN MY LIFE...BUT....

EVERYTHING TO THIS POINT WITH MY DAUGHTER IS...SHE MADE CHOICES...I WOULD OF NEVER DONE IN LIFE...CUZ SHE THE PARTY GIRL...DRUGS AND DRINKING BEFORE HER CHILDREN...AND THEY ARE TAKEN AWAY ....ITS ON HER...NOT ME...LIKE I SAID BEFORE..MY CHILDREN WERE NOT TAKEN AWAY...BUT SEE DCF DONT SEE THAT....SO THEY ARE INVOLVED IN HER LIFE...AND I WOULD THINK....THAT WHEN THE GOVERNMENT GETS INTO YOUR LIFE...TO TELL YOU DO THIS DO THAT TO GET YOUR KIDS BACK....IT WILL BE A COLD DAY IN HELL....IF DCF DID THAT TO ME...WHEN I TOOK CARE OF MY CHILDREN...ME THE RESPONSIBLE MOTHER...PLAYING BY THE BIG GIRL RULES...OBEYS THE LAW...TAKING BS FROM EVERYONE...AND STILL TAKE CARE OF MY OWN..IM JUST SAYIN............

FUNNY

DCF.....ALL WHAT IM BLOGGIN ABOUT IS DOUCMENTED WHAT SHE DONE...IN HER LIFE...14 YR OLD PAPER TRAIL....LIKE U KNOW THAT....IF U DO....YOU WOULD SEE THAT MY CHILDREN WERE NOT TAKING AWAY WHEN I WAS THERE PARENT....AND THATS BACK IN "HRS" TIME....SO....SHE IS A PRODUCT OF HRS 1990'S STYLE.....ALL THESE 20/30 SOMETHINGS ARE YOUR UPBRINGING....YOU DIDNT HELP ME....WHEN I ASKED...AND U ARE HELPING HER....TO GET HER STRAGIHT....AND WHATS RIGHT......

A THOUGHT..........

YOU HAVE THREE CHILDREN.......YOUR AN EIGHT GRADE DROP OUT...NO EDUCATION...NO JOB U CAN HOLD DOWN...OR A ROOF OVER YOUR CHILDREN HEADS....NO MONEY...NUTHING....AND ARE ALL ABOUT YOU...HAVING TO PARTY....AND DRINK AND SMOKE AND DO DRUGS.....CUZ YOU HAD PROBLEMS....

MISSY U THE ONE THAT RAN THE STREETS....ALL THIS TIME.....SO U HAD A ROOF OVER THERE HEADS FOR A MINUTE....BUT....YOU DIDNT HAVE NUTHING TO SHOW FOR IT....NO JOB..NO CAR...NO MONEY....NO HOME....AND U LIVED OFF ME...ON AND OFF...AND ME BEING THE CONTROLLING MOTHER....U CLAIM I AM....U CAME TO ME.....AND I TOOK CARE OF ALL OF YOU....I GUESS THAT IS NOT  WHAT FAMILY IS TO YOU....SO IM THE PROBLEM...RIGHT...

YOU MADE THAT STEP TO RUN THE STREETS.....I TOOK CARE OF MY CHILDREN....YES I TOOK CARE OF YOU TIL YOU WERE 29...W/ 3 KIDS....YOU MADE THOSE CHOICES IN YOUR LIFE....NOT ME..BUT YOU..YOU THE STRIPPER...YOU THE DRUG ADDICT..YOU THE DRINKER...AND THE CHILDREN ARE IN FOSTERCARE.....SO...YOU MADE YOUR BED....AND YOU ARE LYIN IN IT....

I TOOK CARE OF MY CHILDREN....DID SOMETHING WITH MY LIFE...NEVER WAS ON THE STREETS...HAD FOOD..CLOTHING...LIGHTS...HOME...CAR....TOYS....AND I DIDNT GET MY KIDS TAKEN AWAY FROM "HRS"..."DCF"...SO.....WHAT U GONNA TO DO........IM THE GROWN ASS WOMAN HERE...WHEN ARE U GOING TO STEP UP TO THE PLATE..........

THINKIN

AS THESE DAYS GO BY...I SIT HERE WONDERING AND KNOWING...THAT THIS CHILD OF MINE...GOING ON 30 IS MAKING SURE THAT I AM THE THE DEVIL OF A MOTHER...TELLING THEM HOW ROTTEN I WAS OR EVIL OR IGNORANT OR STUPID OR CONTROLLING I WAS....WELL LETS SEE..................


SO MY DAUGHTER HAS BEEN RUNNING THE STREETS SINCE SHE WAS 13...one...I TOOK CARE OF MY CHILDREN..HAD TO LIVE IN THE PROJECTS FOR A MINUTE WENT FROM A 2 BEDROOM TO A 3 BEDROOM APT (PROJECTS) SEE I WENT TO COLLEGE AS I WAS A SINGLE PARENT AT THE TIME TO BETTER MYSELF(MOM)(THE BLOGGER) WHEN  SHE  WAS 13 SHE STARTED TO GET OUT OF HAND AND HUNG AROUND THE HOOD RATS...RUNNING...SHE WOULD STAY OUT 3-4 NIGHTS ON THE STREETS..ME BEING A RESPONSIBLE MOM I MADE CHILD MISSING REPORTS EVERY TIME SHE DID THAT...(lakeland police) SHE  CALLED HRS ON ME 6 TIMES AND WAS UNFOUNDED TIL THAT 6TH SOCIAL WORKER SAW THE PROBLEM.......MY DAUGHTER...(i was told to cover my ass while she ran the streets...so i made thousands of child missing reports and then callin them when she came back home...one time the police told me to spank her...i said right i would have hrs on me for hitting my kid...) SO ME BEING MOM LIKE ALWAYS..SHE WAS GOING OR HEADING TO A CHILDREN'S HOME...BUT...THE GIRL GOT HER PERIOD....AND MOM...HERE MELTED LIKE WE SUPPOSE TO DO....WAS BY MY CHILD'S SIDE...SHE NEEDED HER MOTHER...SEE MY CHILD CUSS AT ME..YELLED AT ME...CONTROL ME AND KEPT THIS UP ...WHAT I  WAS SUCH A GULLIBLE MOM..THAT I TOOK CARE OF MY KIDS ALL THIS TIME...I WAS APART OF THERE LIVES...I MADE SURE THEY HAD THE LASTEST TOY AND SUCH...AND I LET HER TREAT ME THE WAY SHE DID.....(im old school...i respected my elders i didnt talk back sure the hell i didnt cuss at my parents...and if children and familes was back in the 1960/1970's tell my parents how to raise me or gee we all be the parents they want us to be..(DCF) RIGHT.............LOL...WHEN MY CHILD WAS HER AGE AND THESE CHILDREN NOW20/30'S ARE THE PRODUCT OF HRS...U CANT HIT THAT CHILD..YOU WOULD GET THE CHILDREN TAKEN AWAY....WELL I TOOK CARE OF MY CHILDREN...I GOT MARRIED LATE IN LIFE AND LIVE PAYCHECK TO PAYCHECK...SHIT THAT THE AMERICAN WAY............HELLO..............more in A MINUTE.....

YOU SAY YOUR A GROWN ASS WOMAN.........

WELL...YOUR NOT......IM YOUR MOTHER...AND I AM A GROWN ASS WOMAN...YOU HAVE TO PLAY BY THE RULES...AND YOU ANIT OR HAVE THEM BIG GIRL RULES DONE YET....SO PREACH YOUR SHIT TO SOMEONE ELSE....CUZ THIS BITCH PLAYS BY THE RULES....ALWAYS HAVE...ALWAYS WILL.................take note...little girl.................

just saying.................

really dont care what you all think...when im sitting here....talkin about my daughter here....puttin her under the bus....but like i said i was and i will set this little girl straight..if its the last thing i do......ive been thru hell and back....and i will not be a victim of her any longer......to be emtionally...mentally and physically abuse by her......and she was an adult doing this to me since she was 13...and she will be 30 this year.....no longer....but.....the disrespect from her is the kicker.....that will never happen again......so.... i dont give a damn what u all think.....I WILL SET THIS LITTLE GIRL....STRAIGHT.........keep THE CON GOING ON WITH GOD ....JASMINE.....U CANT FOOL THIS OLD BAG..........

why u conning god..............

u made your way of life all on your own....and u claim god is in your life now....u conning lighthouse minisitries....keep it up jaz.....CON AS BITCH...IS YOUR MIDDLE NAME.....sittin back ....to see this all happen again......

to jaz..............

as of today....this is the day i stop the cycle............on you...its been good that its this long since we havent say anything to each other....and u broke me...BYE............

honor my mother and father...................

like thats going to happen...............i might had a fuck up life and dysfunctional family big time....but i was a better parent to my children then was given to me.....and you little girl.........u going around telling everybody i beat the shit out of you....bring it little girl....back it up.....at least 6 people will tell you different...including your step daddy that adored you................and u disrespect your mommy..(me) ....bring it...........in the words of CHARLIE SHEEN...WINNING......................LOL.............. i will never ever give u the chance to be my daughter ever again......done...over it....you on your own.....u always told me you u were grown...bitch u anit grown....2 yrs have gone by and your children are still in fostercare....and i took care of my children....with no help from my family............we done little girl...............but i will put you in check...on this blog...as long as live......YOU CANT CON THIS BITCH EVER AGAIN......TO BAD SO SAD.....your mammy.....................

more of the story after the $2 apartment...

well i had clean up the apt and gave everything away..while she sat in jail...for hitting the girls father.....the judge said she couldn live back at the apt.....was i wrong to let it go....nope..............jaz wants too and says she will live in the hood...where ever she lives in life....better yourself little girl.........damn...u have three kids to think about...give them a life............i lived in the projects for 1988/1995 and somehow...she wants to be a hoodrat............for herself...come on...what the hell is wrong with you....its ok to live somewhere for a minute....not puttin the projects down...but....do whats right and better yourself..thats what i did.....anyways....she lived with me on and off while prego with melly mac in 2009....she was going to lighthouse ministires she lasted a week....and come knocking on my door...and did kick them out..and she started to live with jessica....and by the time melly was born...she let me have the girls ....for a minute.....and i let her back in my house when melly was born.....and once again kicked them out of the house...with 3 kids...i knew her last resort was salvation army.................more later............

a thought...........

the picture of jasmine and passion....carbon copy little girls..............does she know what she has in life.... children that been given to her....is she going to come thru for them....

DO YOU SEE WHAT I SEE..........

JASMINE ABOVE...PASSION BELOW

3 GENERATIONS...

AND SHE IS WILLING TO THROW IT AWAY TO EXECLUDED ME........

MY CHILD...

ON HER FIRST BIRTHDAY............

WHEN READING MY BLOGS.........

READ AT YOUR OWN RISK............IM JUST SAYIN...............

potty training..............

my oldest granddaughter did really well and learning how to go potty... but my second granddaughter......got her ass whippped...literally whipped  cuz she wouldnt go to the bathroom...i could remember she beatin the child when she messed in her clothes...and the one time they were living with me...and she made a mistake...i told her it was go...she already crying and thinking she was going to get whopped...i said no..granny here i will not do that...and i would  clean her help and explain how too....that was her only control left....where she was gettin whooped...and didnt want to learn how to go potty....but in the end she got the hang of it........love u monster...granny loves you...

GET UP OUT MY HEAD................

I WILL NOT LET YOU DISTORYED ME...WHAT SO EVER....GET THE F OUT OF MY HEAD...YOU HAVE HURT ME...TO THE ENDS OF THE EARTH....AND IM DONE WITH YOU.....MY SONS ARE MY LIFE....AND GETTING ME THRU THIS...DAMN YOU....

there was good times.......

as i sit here and blog about my kid.......the laughs we had...the birthday parties for the granddaughters... the time i had to go to mississippi twice to get the girls....the concerns  i had for keke and laylay...the plan that they would be in the afterschool program at the church..where gunny's been going since kindergarden...the plan that they were with me for a minute...when she was pregant with melly.....the many times that jaz said im sorry mommy to me a million times.  and i let her in my home, my life...with the havic bullshit....she gave me....the times she would stick up for me...tellin people u dont treat my mama like that....thou she was the one who disrespected me and yell at me and cuss at me....the times i took her to work...few and far betweeen jobs she had....running her all over lakeland to her friends houses......the times when it was just her an me when we went out to lunch....she knew how to rake me over with her con ness of buying her cigs or black and milds....cancer sticks....or mommy i will pay you back....when i get paid....like that happen.. ususally all she would do would get me a coke and that was payment...but.....i sit here and i had no money and i supported her with her kids ....on an off ...including when i kicked her out of my house.....so....now that life change in aug of 2009 to the present....its no longer of the good times... its heart wrenching and i living with out my grandbabies knowing she will make sure i never see them again........i dont like this situation...at all........

her $2 apartment..........

i let her have the iron bunkbed for the girls and she had a matress for her apartment... she had a tv and dresser and all there toys.....she moved in april of 2008.. there were times i liked going over there...either becuz she needed to go to the store of food..and spending the day with me...or me havin the girls for a minute...and i would drop her off...and i use to love saying goodbye to the babies....her down fall was sometimes she was selling her foodstamps to get beer and cigs.. in place of food...(leftover food stamps)i  could remember when i would knock on the door...and he aint answered it..once or twice the girls would answer the door and she out on the bed.........i can wonder what she was doing...livin in the projects...she was in her element.....literally....fatboy the girls father lived with me for a minute...and i told him he had to leave...so he ended up with jaz...3days and all hell broke loose.....he comes home from work that day....and the key is in the door....thats odd....so he sees the girls on the couch watching cartoons....she was drunk and  pass out in her bed....he asked her why the key in the door..i was concern for the safety of his kids... somehow he and her were fighting and he choked her and she hit him with a baseball bat.........so he makes a report and gets arrested for viloation of probation and she turns herself in and told me to come and pick up the girls at melissa house and i did and i was yelling at her..why were the keys in the door ...and the girls  not being watch....she had no answer for this.....and its like doesnt she know just what happen....

if i had to think what really happen was she was letting this quentin gant come over and they partied and drank and screwing..while the girls are on the couch on attended...........for the key incident.....

so they were in jail.....i always told jasmine to protect herself when a man hits you....i wasnt there for her..at that moment and til she came over to the house and told me what happen... but see....all the guys she went out with hit her..............HELLO,,,THEY HIT YOU JAZ.............DUH...........so we got a restarining order against fatboy while he was still in jail.............she was living at nicki house and i had the girls living with me...i let the apartement go..cuz the judge requested...jaz was pissed...i was following that was asked....i picked her up from nicki and i notice a pudge on her.....i thought i my god she is pregant....talking about disappointed cant take care of the two u got and your pregant....well down the line when i got the news he was a boy that  went away..my grandson......more in a minute..........

i thought

something i may repeat a thing or two.,...but when i let this story cont....im bascially letting you all know and that im going to put her straight....if thats the last thing i do......

we were still at ariana street...

i live.d there for 6years and in between all that....see i moved in2002 so she lived with me on and off from 2004/2008...twice going to mississippi to pick her up.. but alll the bs what was going on....the druggies coming in an out of my drive way her friends coming and going...and one would come over just for them to drink and listen to the music...to many times i told them to turn that radio down...and the sometimes the girls were up...and they are watching there mother drinking ...what kind of parenting is that...my house was always a mess...the kitchen destroyed the carpet in the living room was on livable....but as she lived with me on and off during these years....she finally got housing....in government housing across town...paying 2 dollar rent....and i paid 6months inadvance for her and the deposit.....details on this adventure next...................